Update and some brooding...

Another day, another post, another update. Nothing much going on except I'm pretty brooding at the moment. A little catchup first though. 

Bristol sent another email on preparation for the interview, work experience form and some other general information. 

Glasgow finally finally acknowledged my application and I can rest in peace with the thought that all my applications have reached.

Nottingham has a representative in India who will be attending some fairs and I'll be going to one of them to ask questions and stuff. 

Now, my brooding. 

I have a question. An eternal question. Why do people feel the need to be recognized or awarded by others? Okay I understand wanting your close friends or family to be proud of you but I'm pretty sure if you're a great person they'll know anyway. 

It puzzles me how much people fight for awards or certificates in school. So what if you're popular in school? So what if people know you? That doesn't mean they like you or respect you. Everybody knew who Bin Laden was but was he respected? He thought what he was doing was right I'm pretty sure. 

This being said of course I understand that if you do something you love and you're rewarded for it its a great feeling also, I admit I would never turn down an award even if I thought I didn't deserve it. But WHY do I feel this way? Is it society? Is it me? Is it the need to stand out amongst so many? 

Then of course the fact that everybody thinks their work is the most important. Teachers expect you to stay in school doing extra curricular till the night and then expect you to get good marks in the test the next day too. There are so many people doing better and better that to stand out you need to do even better than better. In today's world you need to be perfect. 

Is perfect possible? I don't think it is. I count myself as an optimist but there are moments like this where I feel more like a realist. Then I redefine my meaning of an optimist. I believe an optimist is a person who has moments like this. They have completely dark moments too. Optimists however are those people who despite it all, are able to truly laugh sincerely after such moments. 

Then again hope remains huh? We're all a bunch of chemicals anyway that have somehow developed a conscience. How is that possible? It's crazy how bits of chemicals make us all act and feel a particular thing. It's one of the reasons I love biology and one of the reasons I love animals. 

Humans are flawed. Greatly flawed. It's in their genes. Most people look down on animals because they don't seems as intelligent or clever or have the same capabilities we do but I envy them. I believe they are genetically better than us. After all, they're not the ones destroying themselves and all those around them. They have problems too of course but I think we have more. 

Maybe we would have been better off as a monkey. Maybe we should have stuck with trees. But then science says our bodies seem to be getting better. But what is science really? Something molecules in our head made up. But it's fascinating. These molecules think they're fascinating. This is crazy. It's philosophy. 

The bottom line is its all in our genes and environment. Genetics is the reason I believe in fate and destiny. It's all preceded in these molecules. The world can be explained through science. I think philosophy will be explained someday too. I can't wait.