Edinburgh Interview and Imperial Offer!

I got the Edinburgh interview first and I seriously screech like a banashee when I opened the email!



I'm so happy about that but there are specific centres where we can take the interview and the closest one is Singapore.



Then I got an Imperial interview. When I opened my UCAS track I literally sat like this for a whole 5 minutes:



I was so not expecting that at all. I had just applied to Imperial on a whim, never really thinking I would get in. It was a great feeling.

Basically, I've been busy studyi- oh who am I kidding. I've gotten addicted to books again. Help me dear god, I finished 6 books in the last 7 days and I'm in the middle of my practice tests.



Damn authors and the huge amounts of books.

I should really study though and I've promised myself I won't read a book till the 8th now, which is my last practice test. I'm struggling with organic chemistry at the moment and can't seem to learn a thing.



Still, so excited for Edinburgh and Bristol and really hoping for a Nottingham interview next. Wish me luck!



Love,
JoAT

Update and some brooding...

Another day, another post, another update. Nothing much going on except I'm pretty brooding at the moment. A little catchup first though. 

Bristol sent another email on preparation for the interview, work experience form and some other general information. 

Glasgow finally finally acknowledged my application and I can rest in peace with the thought that all my applications have reached.

Nottingham has a representative in India who will be attending some fairs and I'll be going to one of them to ask questions and stuff. 

Now, my brooding. 

I have a question. An eternal question. Why do people feel the need to be recognized or awarded by others? Okay I understand wanting your close friends or family to be proud of you but I'm pretty sure if you're a great person they'll know anyway. 

It puzzles me how much people fight for awards or certificates in school. So what if you're popular in school? So what if people know you? That doesn't mean they like you or respect you. Everybody knew who Bin Laden was but was he respected? He thought what he was doing was right I'm pretty sure. 

This being said of course I understand that if you do something you love and you're rewarded for it its a great feeling also, I admit I would never turn down an award even if I thought I didn't deserve it. But WHY do I feel this way? Is it society? Is it me? Is it the need to stand out amongst so many? 

Then of course the fact that everybody thinks their work is the most important. Teachers expect you to stay in school doing extra curricular till the night and then expect you to get good marks in the test the next day too. There are so many people doing better and better that to stand out you need to do even better than better. In today's world you need to be perfect. 

Is perfect possible? I don't think it is. I count myself as an optimist but there are moments like this where I feel more like a realist. Then I redefine my meaning of an optimist. I believe an optimist is a person who has moments like this. They have completely dark moments too. Optimists however are those people who despite it all, are able to truly laugh sincerely after such moments. 

Then again hope remains huh? We're all a bunch of chemicals anyway that have somehow developed a conscience. How is that possible? It's crazy how bits of chemicals make us all act and feel a particular thing. It's one of the reasons I love biology and one of the reasons I love animals. 

Humans are flawed. Greatly flawed. It's in their genes. Most people look down on animals because they don't seems as intelligent or clever or have the same capabilities we do but I envy them. I believe they are genetically better than us. After all, they're not the ones destroying themselves and all those around them. They have problems too of course but I think we have more. 

Maybe we would have been better off as a monkey. Maybe we should have stuck with trees. But then science says our bodies seem to be getting better. But what is science really? Something molecules in our head made up. But it's fascinating. These molecules think they're fascinating. This is crazy. It's philosophy. 

The bottom line is its all in our genes and environment. Genetics is the reason I believe in fate and destiny. It's all preceded in these molecules. The world can be explained through science. I think philosophy will be explained someday too. I can't wait.  

And nothing...

Posts almost everyday and then nothing. Ooh, kind of like my application to UK process. So much to do and now just waiting. It's crazy! I got all excited about the Bristol interview and submitting this and that and now this waiting is agony. More so because NOTHING happens over the weekend.



The Indian exam registrations are also opening up and I've already applied to Manipal for medical and I'm thinking of applying for biotechnology as well. Not that I'm thinking of doing human medicine at all but just as a practice for the aipvt. It'll be useful because I know I will study and revise 4-5 times this way before sitting for the pvt.

Honestly, I don't have much to say. I could just keep typing what I'm thinking like my best friend told me to I guess.



Parents don't really know how to help their children deal with the boards pressure in India do they? They say 'I know you can do it' or '96% se bhi kuch nahi hota' (you can't get anywhere even with a 96%) or even 'siraf X days bache hai beta' (only x days left) but what they don't seem to realize is rather than spurring us to study this just makes us feel the pressure even more. Personally, I've never had a day where my mother hasn't asked 'how much did you study today?'

It's my job mom, I know what I have to do. You don't need to remind me EVERYDAY that I have to study. Yeah I know what I'm doing is hard. Yes, you need amazing marks in India. Yes, I know it's competivtive. No, you reminding me again and again does not help. Yes, I know there are lacks of people giving the same exams I am. Yes, I know there are people who study 14 hours a day. Yes, I've seen how much the topper in my class studies. No, I haven't studied as much as they did.



Don't get me wrong, I know they're doing this for my good and I rarely (okay quite a bit) snap at my mother for asking the same things over and over but there has to be a point where they understand that they're not helping.

I really hope someday when I have kids I'll figure out a way to do things in a much better way. I know I'll never make my parent's mistakes. I love my parents of course but sometimes they're a bit too much. In India especially, children are expected to turn into robots for at least 6 months during their boards and get good grades as their output in the end.

I'm sorry I can't do that. I'm sorry I have to read books to keep sane. I'm sorry I can't stop going on 9gag. I'm sorry for wanting to watch a movie sometimes. I'm sorry for wanting to follow ONE series on TV. Most of all, I'm sorry for not being sorry at all.